The Happy Marriage: One Valentine’s Day at a Time


Heart candy


Let’s face it. Valentine’s Day can put a lot of pressure on us—if we’re not in a relationship, if our relationship isn’t going well, if we don’t have much money, or if we want to make the day really special. How can we celebrate it with meaning to strengthen the relationships we have?


Making Valentine’s Day Special when you’re not in a Relationship


Last week, I wrote about Valentine’s Day when you’re single and invited readers to think about ways they could make the day meaningful.  See Alone on Valentine’s Day…


Re-connecting with your partner


The idea of celebrating Valentine’s Day can be tough when you’re feeling stressed, resentful, angry, or distant with your partner. Yet the day presents an opportunity to re-connect, to remember why you’re together, and to do something you both enjoy.  For some ideas on rebuilding your relationship, go to Rediscovering Love and Connection.


Loving Relationships


Valentine’s Day can be an opportunity to show your support, love, and care for an important person in your life, whether s/he is your significant other, friend, or family.  Showing him/her that you care doesn’t have to mean spending a lot of money.


“Attention is love.”

~Karen Maezen Miller


In what ways can you give the person or people you love some attention? How can you listen with completely open ears? How can you stay fully present when s/he talks? How can you show that you really understand what s/he is trying to say?


What is something you could do to show that you understand and support what is important to him or her? Would it be joining her or him in an activity s/he loves, writing him/her a special note, texting them a nice message, or giving her or him some homemade heart-shaped cookies? In what other ways can you show you care?


Making Valentine’s Day Special


Suppose you could spend the most amazing day possible with your Valentine or with friends or family that mean a lot to you. What would you be doing that would tell you it’s the most incredible day? What would you be doing that would make it really special and meaningful? What is one small thing you could do to show that person you really love him or her? What else could you do?


Spending some meaningful time with your significant other or a person who means a lot to you doesn’t need to cost much. You might spend the day together doing something sexy (i.e. spending the day in bed) or fun (i.e. skiing); or you might do something nice for him or her; make something for her or him; cook breakfast, lunch, or dinner, or bake something. Valentine’s Day is not only about romance. It’s about strengthening the bonds we have by doing something to demonstrate your caring. What will you do?