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You and your partner have worked all day long. You’re home now and tired. But there’s dinner to make, dishes to do, tidying, and laundry. If you have kids, there’s a whole lot more to the list-spending time with her/him/them, helping with homework, going to extra-curricular activities-possibly more than one if you have more than one child. Where do you fit time in for you, let alone your partner??
It can be really easy to get caught up in day-to-day responsibilities and feel as if you have no time for anything else. We’ve all been there. As the days, months , and years carry on, however, you may start to feel as if you’re roommates and nothing else.
Suppose you and your partner or spouse could do something together that you both really enjoy. What would it be? A walk? A romantic meal? Exercise? An art show? What else would you like to with him or her?
What’s something you’ve done in the past that you both really enjoyed? Take a moment to go back to memory lane. Where were you? What did you do? What did you see and hear? Spend a few moments reflecting on it… What made this experience so good?
What did you do that helped make that time together memorable? How about your partner?
Where have you gone on a holiday together that you really loved? What did you do? What made that time so special for both of you?
Sexual intimacy is a really important part of a relationship. What do you do to encourage intimacy? What do you do to make the experience good, relaxing, fun-filled, or loving? What helps you and your partner want to have sex together?
I’ve heard people say that it shouldn’t be so much work to be together-that things should just flow naturally. Ideas like this can lead to questions about whether you’re meant to be together or not, or whether there’s anything you should do to save your marriage or partnership.
Consider when you first started dating. Did you make plans together, decide what you were going to do and make preparations to do them? Of course you did!! At the very least, you made sure you had a shower, did your hair, and put on some nice clothing. And you probably did other things to make sure you had a good time together. What did you do to plan for your date?
It may have been really exciting to put that effort in because everything was so fresh and new. What are you doing now that helps maintain some freshness? What could you do that would help you re-build your relationship? Suppose you were just beginning dating, what would you do to connect with this person? What might you do now to re-connect?
Spending time together alone doing things you both enjoy makes a difference. Re-connecting can save marriages or partnerships. It takes thought, some effort, and some time. What will you do?
Take the time to re-connect during a couple’s retreat in Banff, Alberta. Click the link below for more info: